Knock Knock

Figaro the Fish responded to Umberto the Unlucky’s bad beat story with the tale of his own tournament demise as a series of knock knock jokes.

[FF] “Knock Knock.”

[UU] “Who’s there?”

[FF] “Adelia.”

[UU] “Adelia who?”

[FF] “Adelia the cards so we can start playing.” {Tournament begins}

[FF] “Knock Knock.”

[UU] “Who’s there?”

[FF] “Robin.”

[UU] “Robin who?”

[FF] “Robin my blinds, are you?” {Folds big blind to Elias’s button raise}

[FF] “Knock Knock.”

[UU] “Who’s there?”

[FF] “Andy.”

[UU] “Andy who?”

[FF] “Andy stole my blinds again!” {Folds to Elias’s button raise again}

[FF] “Knock Knock.”

[UU] “Who’s there?”

[FF] “Ima.”

[UU] “Ima who?”

[FF] “Ima gettin’ fed up with you stealing my blinds.” {And again}

[FF] “Knock Knock.”

[UU] “Who’s there?”

[FF] “Dawn.”

[UU] “Dawn who?”

[FF] “Dawn keep takin’ my chips!” {Folds to Elias’s continuation bet}

[FF] “Knock Knock.”

[UU] “Who’s there?”

[FF] “Ollie.”

[UU] “Ollie who?”

[FF] “Ollie does is bet, bet, bet!” {Folds to Elias’s turn bet}

[FF] “Knock Knock.”

[UU] “Who’s there?”

[FF] “Ewan.”

[UU] “Ewan who?”

[FF] “Ewan me are like peas in a pod. I really like my chips, and you really like my chips.” {Folds to Elias’s river bet}

[FF] “Knock Knock.”

[UU] “Who’s there?”

[FF] “Aaron.”

[UU] “Aaron who?”

[FF] “Aaron on the side of caution. I fold.” {Folds to Elias’s big river bet}

[FF] “Knock Knock.”

[UU] “Who’s there?”

[FF] “Juno.”

[UU] “Juno who?”

[FF] “Juno you’re driving me crazy?!” {Folds to Elias’s preflop raise}

[FF] “Knock Knock.”

[UU] “Who’s there?”

[FF] “Juan.”

[UU] “Juan who?”

[FF] “Juan of these days, I’ll catch you bluffing.” {Folds to Elias’s turn raise}

[FF] “Knock Knock.”

[UU] “Who’s there?”

[FF] “Alfred.”

[UU] “Alfred who?”

[FF] “Alfred of busting out. I fold.” {Folds to Elias’s turn overbet}

[FF] “Knock Knock.”

[UU] “Who’s there?”

[FF] “Colin.”

[UU] “Colin who?”

[FF] “Colin you out on this time.” {Calls Elias’s river raise…}

[FF] “Knock Knock.”

[UU] “Who’s there?”

[FF] “Ike.”

[UU] “Ike who?”

[FF] “Ike can’t stop donking off my chips.” {… and loses}

[FF] “Knock Knock.”

[UU] “Who’s there?”

[FF] “Tex.”

[UU] “Tex who?”

[FF] “Tex two to tango!” {Calls Elias’s flop bet and is all-in}

[FF] “Knock Knock.”

[UU] “Who’s there?”

[FF] “Anita.”

[UU] “Anita who?”

[FF] “Anita rebuy!” {Gets a new chip stack}

[FF] “Knock Knock.”

[UU] “Who’s there?”

[FF] “Ivana.”

[UU] “Ivana who?”

[FF] “Ivana win a pot some time tonight.” {Waits for hole cards to be dealt}

[FF] “Knock Knock.”

[UU] “Who’s there?”

[FF] “Abbott.”

[UU] “Abbott who?”

[FF] “Abbott time I got some cards!” {Wins small pot}

[FF] “Knock Knock.”

[UU] “Who’s there?”

[FF] “Holly.”

[UU] “Holly who?”

[FF] “Holly-lujah, I got some more cards!” {Wins medium pot}

[FF] “Knock Knock.”

[UU] “Who’s there?”

[FF] “Asa.”

[UU] “Asa who?”

[FF] “Asa spades, Ace of hearts!” {Wins big pot with a full house}

[FF] “Knock Knock.”

[UU] “Who’s there?”

[FF] “Candace.”

[UU] “Candace who?”

[FF] “Candace get any better? Another full house!” {Wins bigger pot and claims chip lead at the table}

[FF] “Knock Knock.”

[UU] “Who’s there?”

[FF] “Dewey.”

[UU] “Dewey who?”

[FF] “Dewey, Cheatem, and Howe.” {Shows a bluff}

[FF] “Knock Knock.”

[UU] “Who’s there?”

[FF] “Izzy.”

[UU] “Izzy who?”

[FF] “Izzy come, Izzy go.” {Gets caught on a big river bluff}

[FF] “Knock Knock.”

[UU] “Who’s there?”

[FF] “Ella.”

[UU] “Ella who?”

[FF] “Ella-mentary, my dear Watson! Oops.” {Deduces opponent’s hand incorrectly…}

[FF] “Knock Knock.”

[UU] “Who’s there?”

[FF] “Ida.”

[UU] “Ida who?”

[FF] “Ida thought you would have raised under the gun preflop with Aces.” {… and loses the pot}

[FF] “Knock Knock.”

[UU] “Who’s there?”

[FF] “Les.”

[UU] “Les who?”

[FF] “Les party!” {Calls all-in}

[FF] “Knock Knock.”

[UU] “Who’s there?”

[FF] “Jean.”

[UU] “Jean who?”

[FF] “Jean-ius call that one.” {Has nary an out on the river}

[FF] “Knock Knock.”

[UU] “Who’s there?”

[FF] “Chris.”

[UU] “Chris who?”

[FF] “Christmas came early for you this year.” {Congratulates the player who knocked him out}

[FF] “Knock Knock.”

[UU] “Who’s there?”

[FF] “Scott.”

[UU] “Scott who?”

[FF] “Scott no chips and no rebuys left, so I guess I’m the first one out of the tournament.” {Gets up from the table.}

[FF] “Knock Knock.”

[UU] “Who’s there?”

[FF] “Tom.”

[UU] “Tom who?”

[FF] “Tomorrow’s another day.” {Vows to return for next month’s tournament}

[FF] “Knock Knock.”

[UU] “Who’s there?”

[FF] “Althea.”

[UU] “Althea who?”

[FF] “Althea in the side game.” {Leaves table}

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